Is OMing the female Viagra?

 

Photo Courtesy of Ornello Pics

Photo Courtesy of Ornello Pics

Ladies and gents, it came and it went: International Day of the Female Orgasm. Not to be confused with International Orgasm Day which was back in July, this festive holiday was all about the ladies. And, given reports that estimate that only one in ten women experience orgasm, a little extra attention seems to be in order.

So, if you will, step aside male circumcision campaigners, and let’s cede the mattress to the subject of women’s Big-O. While some opinionators, (yoo-hoo fellow Looper Gord Woodward), deliberate over the sexual ROI of getting circumcised, the ladies are cooling off, wondering when they can get some closure already so they can get back onto eBay.

It would be nifty if all men paid as much interest to our orgasms as they do to their own, but since that’s not the case, we’re going to have to get there ourselves. Lucky for us, there’s hope on the horizon. Big pharma hasn’t given up finding the magic bullet to help women say, “yes, Yes, YES”. They’ve been at it like feral rabbits, working overtime to create the perfect cocktail of drugs and hormones to fan the flames of female desire while tamping down the nasty side effects like beard growth and the urge to go on murderous rampages. So far, they’re still at first base.

On the other end of the science spectrum, (and for those women who like their sex aids granola-flavoured), there’s OMing.

OMing or ”orgasmic meditation” promises to bring the Big-O to a neighbourhood near you. Started by San Francisco-based Nicole Daedone, there are now chapters in most major cities around the world. Fans, like Karen Lorre, actress, and former model and Playmate, claim to have achieved 11 orgasms in one day using the method. (Though it seems a bit daft to sit around in a group fondling oneself while “meditating”, yoga seemed freaky when it came to the West and now everyone is doing downward dogs.)

Not to be anti-orgasm or anything but what is the point of striving for 11 orgasms a day? It seems time-consuming and, frankly, awfully narcissistic. There’s a big world out there: books to read, causes to help, money to earn. Is diddling yourself to the point of exhaustion the best use of one’s time on Earth?

Frankly, the OMing trend seems like less of a path to enlightenment and more like an all-out money grab from overly self-involved women. A visit to Daedone’s website (for research purposes only), shows a packed lecture schedule that includes such orgasm-challenged places as London, New York, Paris and Denver. While you are waiting for her to straddle your town, you can go online and purchase a slew of official OM supplies, including the Stroker’s Kit containing lube, a “stroker’s bag” (whatever), towels and vinyl gloves. Three sessions with a “certified” OM coach will set you back $575. What, you thought your orgasms should be free?

At no charge you can watch a video of five men saying what OMing has done for them. It’s unlikely that will get you off, so start saving those shillings ladies!

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